My Journey Begins Today

So this is where it all starts! I wish I could kick off with a positive quote or saying but I'm afraid I'm nowhere near 'that place' yet. I have been a bad person in life so far, there's no getting away from this and I will never hide from this fact. I'm not saying I'm a demon or I have never done any good in life - I have. It's just that the bad things completely outweigh the good things.


I need to change, I have to change, now is the time to change! This is the 'last chance saloon' and I am lucky to have this chance. Life should be great! I look around me at the Welsh countryside and I'm filled with awe and wonder - this is how it should be all the time shouldn't it? The title of this blog should not put you off - I'm Welsh, that's obvious, but this blog applies to anyone, anywhere.


Just by writing the first two paragraphs I'm already feeling a little better - writing gives me direction and helps me feel a little better. It's pretty hard to know where to start with my story because I cannot remember when I started to go downhill. At a guess I would say it was when I was first arrested aged 10 ( yep, ten! ) for shoplifting with two of my best mates. Lets start things off by explaining what happened yesterday.


Yesterday, me and my 6 year old son were involved in the carrying of the Olympic torch through our area with my old rugby team. Sounds good yeah! It was, at first. I love spending time with my son and to give him this experience was great - he loved it. I thought I would throw in this picture below to show the start of proceedings.

The problem arrived at about half 3 in the afternoon, after the run with the torch. My son had had enough sun and was starting to 'slip' a little so I returned him to his mothers house about thirty miles away. As I was driving back I had one thing on my mind - alcohol. All day long I had watched my mates drinking and I was well aware that I could not ( I do not drink with my son present if I can help it ). I don't drink to be social, I drink to get pissed - no question! 

I got pretty messed up with good friends who I hadn't seen for a while and was still drinking at 2am the next morning ( today ). You see I'm an addict, or, if you prefer, I have an addictive personality - I can get addicted to just about any vice. Instead of working today I spent the whole day lying down on the sofa sweating pure alcohol and feeling dangerously faint. 

Why can I not go out and enjoy myself in regulation - the more far gone I am the more people I irritate or even hurt. I overstepped the line last night and the results could have been a disaster. It's this realization that has led me to create this blog and take note of karma in my life. Are you willing to take this journey with me? I have a hell of a story to tell and a long journey to take - I will pull no punches and I will probably shock you more often or not. This is my last chance and this is something I cannot afford to fail at.